A Kentucky Mother's Journey: Favorite Photos and Quotes
Motherhood is by far the greatest gift I've ever received. As expected, becoming a first-time "mama" 23 months ago changed everything, but all for the better. I have discovered that there is indeed something better than being a Kentucky girl, raising a Kentucky
What I least expected about motherhood is how much my daughter would teach me. I am reminded that it is the little things that matter the most to a child, like needing a hug when she gets a boo-boo or the instinctive desire to dance when she hears music. There are so many little things that enrich our lives that often get overlooked when we get older and get busier. And, I cannot think of a more beautiful place to discover (or rediscover, as in my case) the simple joys of life than against the backdrop of our beautiful state and rich traditions.
To illustrate my own personal journey into motherhood with my daughter, Katherine, here are some of my favorite photos and quotes:
"I think that the best thing we can do for our children is to allow them to do things for themselves, allow them to be strong, allow them to experience life on their own terms, allow them to take the subway...let them be better people, let them believe more in themselves."
Happy Mother's Day, y'all! What are your plans for Sunday?
What I least expected about motherhood is how much my daughter would teach me. I am reminded that it is the little things that matter the most to a child, like needing a hug when she gets a boo-boo or the instinctive desire to dance when she hears music. There are so many little things that enrich our lives that often get overlooked when we get older and get busier. And, I cannot think of a more beautiful place to discover (or rediscover, as in my case) the simple joys of life than against the backdrop of our beautiful state and rich traditions.
To illustrate my own personal journey into motherhood with my daughter, Katherine, here are some of my favorite photos and quotes:
"When you're pregnant, you can think of nothing but having your own body to yourself again, yet after having given birth you realize that the biggest part of you is now somehow external, subject to all sorts of dangers and disappearance, so you spend the rest of your life trying to figure out how to keep it close enough for comfort. That's the strange thing about being a mother: until you have a baby, you don't even realize how much you were missing one."
– Jodi Picoult, Vanishing Act
"No one else will ever know the strength of my love for you. After all, you're the only one who knows what my heart sounds like from the inside."
– Unknown
"Once your baby arrives, the world is no more the same than you are. Because from our very bodies we add to the collective human destiny. Our deepest urge is always toward life, to wholeness and well being."– Claire Fontaine
When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child."
– Sophia Loren
– Sophia Loren
"Motherhood is a choice you make everyday, to put someone else's happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you're not sure what the right thing is...and to forgive yourself, over and over again, for doing everything wrong."
– Donna Ball, At Home on Ladybug Farm Farm
– Donna Ball, At Home on Ladybug Farm Farm
"I looked on child rearing not only as a work of
love and duty but as a profession that was fully as interesting and challenging
as any honorable profession in the world and one that demanded the best that I
could bring to it."
– Rose Kennedy
"The phrase 'working mother' is redundant."
– Jane Sellman
"The phrase 'working mother' is redundant."
– Jane Sellman
"Though motherhood is the most important of all the professions -- requiring more knowledge than any other department in human affairs -- there was no attention given to preparation for this office."
– Elizabeth Cady Stanton
– C. JoyBell C.
“Becoming a mother makes you the mother of all children. From now on each wounded, abandoned, frightened child is yours. You live in the suffering mothers of every race and creed and weep with them. You long to comfort all who are desolate.” – Charlotte Gray
“The great motherhood friendships are the ones in which two women can admit [how difficult mothering is] quietly to each other, over cups of tea at a table sticky with spilled apple juice and littered with markers without tops.” – Anna Quindlen
“The great motherhood friendships are the ones in which two women can admit [how difficult mothering is] quietly to each other, over cups of tea at a table sticky with spilled apple juice and littered with markers without tops.” – Anna Quindlen
"Some of your best moments as a mother will happen around the toilet at six a.m. while you're holding a pile of fingernail clippings like a Santeria princess." – Tina Fey, Bossypants
Happy Mother's Day, y'all! What are your plans for Sunday?
My Mom's Best Lesson
Mothering is one of those things I never know if I'm doing right. I often find myself saying, "I'll do it better next time."
Next year, I'll send out the birthday invitations earlier.
Next month, I will make amazing colorful, healthy lunches for Lauren every day.
Next week, I'll make a homemade dinner every night.
Tomorrow, I won't lose my patience with Ella over something silly.
I find myself worrying about the most random little details. I want my girls to have this beautiful childhood filled with incredible memories, and I put a silly amount of pressure on myself to be some kind of Nick at Nite mom.
The reality is, I get so caught up in planning the decor and cake and presents for birthdays that I often forget to send out invitations at all. I have yet to make a single school lunch for Lauren. (My husband does it. Actually my goal should be to be a better mother than my husband is.) We're lucky if we have 2-3 homemade dinners a week. As for losing my patience, well, Ella's three years old.
My mom will sometimes talk about the regrets she has about things she did when my brother and I were younger. She can name all kinds of things that she wishes she could undo or do over, and she'll describe them in great detail.
And you know what? I don't remember a single one of them.
My mom is an amazing mother. She's fiercely protective of her children, but she lets us fight our own battles. She challenges me to do my best, but never cripples me with her high expectations. She calls me out when I'm being a jerk, but she's always my number one fan. She knows when I need her to hold me and when I need her to let me go.
Most of all, she lets me be who I am, even when I know it isn't always easy. I've never felt like I had to do any certain thing to make my mother proud of me. She's simply thrilled that I wake up and breathe every day. That means more to me than anything--to know that no matter what anyone else may think of me, my mom thinks I'm basically the best thing ever. It sounds silly, especially because I am well aware of my flaws, but knowing I've always got her in my corner is one of my greatest comforts.
Maybe that's what I should strive for with Lauren and Ella. Instead of worrying so much about these picture-perfect details of a storybook childhood, my energy is better spent on making sure they're becoming the people they're supposed to be. I have no idea what they'll become--right now Lauren wants to be a rock star and Ella wants to drive an ice cream truck--but I can help lay the groundwork to help them get there.
I have two very funny, smart, strong-willed girls. As long as I teach them to be confident, to appreciate what they have, to constantly look for things to be happy about, and to, quite simply, love others...what else matters? They're not going to remember all these dumb things I consider failures, but they'll remember how absolutely crazy I am about them. They'll know I've got their backs no matter what, and that the sound of their voices is all I need to be happy.
My mom taught me that, but she'd never take credit for it.
I have two very funny, smart, strong-willed girls. As long as I teach them to be confident, to appreciate what they have, to constantly look for things to be happy about, and to, quite simply, love others...what else matters? They're not going to remember all these dumb things I consider failures, but they'll remember how absolutely crazy I am about them. They'll know I've got their backs no matter what, and that the sound of their voices is all I need to be happy.
My mom taught me that, but she'd never take credit for it.
Mothering in Kentucky
I returned to Kentucky to become a mother. I've written before about how important it was to me that my children be Kentuckians. However, I've come to believe that it was essential not only that they begin their journeys as people in the Bluegrass State but also that I begin my journey as a mother.
First and foremost, I wanted to be home - among my people, among the mothers who mothered me. I knew in my weakest moments as a mother having my mother and my mother's mother and my father's mother mere moments away would make me stronger.
However, it was more than that. Kentucky called to me not only as the place of my birth but as a culture and a way of life that made me the person I am today. I remember long discussions with my husband before we decided to move back to my small hometown. He was concerned about the lack of diversity and opportunity. There would be no museums (beyond the quilt variety of course). No foreign language immersion programs. No art appreciation field trips.
My response was always you have your entire adult life to experience diversity and art and all the big city has to offer.
You only have one childhood.
Kentucky gave me a very specific type of childhood - a childhood built around community and culture. I always had the profound sense that I was being looked out for and supported. I knew the people in my community were rooting for me.
Do children who grow up in different locales experience that?
Of course and I like to think my children would have turned out well no matter where we lived. However, I'm not sure I would have been as good as a mother. I am a striver, a doer, an achiever. The siren song of the big city and all the ambition it symbolizes wouldn't have served me well in my role as a mother.
I need the slow living of my Kentucky home. I need to see the faces and places of my childhood to remind me regularly of what really matters. I need a place where the first thing people ask you is "Do you have any kids?" not "Who do you work for?" in order to be the best mother I can be.
I needed to be in Kentucky.
~ Sarah Stewart Holland
HerKentucky Derby Days: Rebecca Ray Designs Bracelet Giveaway!
With Derby almost here, we have one more Derby Days giveaway for you. Megan B recently profiled the lovely equestrian designs of Rebecca Ray Designs. I just love these products, too. They've got a horsey vibe, but are a little edgy and at times kitschy. I mean, how cute is this bag?
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| The Leona |
And this flask? So perfect for pre-gaming!
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| Leather Flask with Rosette |
Rebecca Ray Designs has kindly offered to give one lucky HerKentucky winner this gorgeous bracelet.
Contest runs through Derby Weekend, so you have until midnight on Sunday to enter.
Good luck, and Happy Derby Days!!
a Rafflecopter giveaway
{No member of the HerKentucky writing staff was compensated for this post.}
HerKentucky Entertaining: Oaks Style
As the Derby’s companion race for 3-year-old fillies, the Kentucky Oaks has always been about the “ladies.” However, over the past 138 years since the first running on May 19, 1875, at the Louisville Jockey Club (former name of Churchill Downs), a few tweaks have been made here and there. For example, the original distance of 1-1/2 miles has been adjusted several times to today’s shorter length of 1-1/8 miles. And, the first Oaks race ran two days after the Kentucky Derby. Today, however, the "Ladies First" theme is both literal and figurative.
In recent years, new Oaks traditions have emerged. For starters, in 1991, the stargazer lily was selected as the official flower of the Kentucky Oaks for its symbol of femininity and strength. Then, in 2006, in honor of the official flower, the race got its own signature drink, the Oaks Lily. As the Kentucky Oaks began to grow in popularity (attendance has doubled since 2001 to over 100,000 today), the day has blossomed into one of the most popular racing events in the United States.
From the fillies, lilies, drinks, and signature color pink, the Oaks is all about the ladies. Even better, it’s a party with a purpose. Prior to the race, be sure to turn your eyes to the main track for a moving sight as 139 breast cancer survivors' walk in the Survivors’ Parade. Also, Churchill Downs will donate $1 from each Oaks Lily sold to Horses and Hope. In 2008, First Lady Jane Beshear founded Horses and Hope with the Kentucky Cancer Program (KCP) to provide breast cancer education, screening and treatment referral for the often overlooked members of Kentucky's horse industry and their families.
Whether you’re going to Churchill or tuning in to watch the spectacular show of pink on television, today is the day to celebrate the special ladies in your life. Although you will not find me among the masses this year, I will bring the flavor and traditions of the day into my home as I casually entertain a few friends.
First, you can't go wrong with stargazer lilies. They're fragrant and stunning. I like to mix them with white hydrangeas and simple greenery for a bright pop of hot pink.
Even though we won't be at Churchill, my guests and I will still get to enjoy the signature drink of the day, the Oaks Lily. This pretty and refreshing cocktail is super easy to make and can be enjoyed throughout the year.
1 oz. Grey Goose® Vodka
1 oz. Sweet and Sour Mix
3 oz. Cranberry Juice
Splash of Triple Sec
Once the ingredients are mixed, place in a glass with ice, and garnish with an orange wedge and a cherry (I added a lime wedge).
I like to serve them in the official Oaks Lily glass. Not only do these stem-less wine glasses make the experience feel more authentic, but they make a great party favor, too.
If you’re celebrating this year’s festivities away from Churchill, please consider sending a donation to Horses and Hope. Tax deductible donations should be made to:
501 E. Broadway, Suite 160
Finally, let's talk about the horses. The fillies today are every bit the match of the boys tomorrow. With three undefeated horses, and a favorite (though twice defeated), Dreaming of Julia, having a "speed figure" (114) that is waaaay above the best any of the boys have ever run (105). For the not-so-serious gamblers, I like to write the names of each filly on a piece of paper for easy entertainment. Guests pay a small amount to play and the winner takes all.
Now, if I were a betting woman...I'd have a hard time looking past the morning-line (and deserving) favorite, Dreaming of Julia, and co-second-choice, Unlimited Budget, but an equally hard time betting on them at short odds given the top-to-bottom quality of this field (how many undefeated fillies can be in a race, anyway?). Under the circumstances, I'd have to try to make my money in a trifecta by wheeling those two in first and second, with the field in third and hope that a live longshot like Pure Fun rounds out the top three. I might also back this up with an exacta box of those two, Pure Fun, Beholder and Midnight Lucky. (And, I'm still rooting for Rosie on Seaneen Girl.) But, like I said, that would only be the case if I were a betting woman...
Who are your favorites for the 139th running of the Kentucky Oaks?
P.S. - My daughter, Katherine, will be the new girl at the party this year, and she’s already learning some of our finest traditions. How adorable is her bonnet from The Beaufort Bonnet Company?
{No member of the HerKentucky team received any compensation for this post.}
The Governor's Downtown Derby Celebration
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| The Official Derby Celebration Poster |
My favorite Derby Day tradition happens during the morning of the first Saturday in May. For many years, the event was dubbed the "Derby Breakfast." It was held at the grounds of the Capitol and breakfast was provided by the Commonwealth to all who wanted to attend, free of charge.
Times have changed, but I think for the better! Due to budget cuts, breakfast is no longer provided. Instead, the Celebration was moved to the Old Capitol and downtown business district of Frankfort - giving local restaurants, food trucks and merchants a chance to shine!
Coordinated in large part by Downtown Frankfort, Inc., the day's activities vary widely. Bands will take the stage in front of the Old Capitol to provide entertainment. Children can participate in stick horse races and the Derby Dash race down Broadway hosted by the Frankfort YMCA. The highlight is a fun bicycle race called the Pedal for the Posies. Local business and civic leaders don ridiculous costumes and race on children's bikes to claim the trophy.
Come enjoy this free event! Bring a little cash to sample traditional breakfast fare from one of the local restaurants or foodtrucks (my favorite is the country ham biscuit from the KY Pork Producers' truck!). Stop by one of the local watering holes for a Bloody Mary or Mimosa.
Start your Derby Day off right!
The HerKentucky Interview with Taste of Derby Chef Stephanie Izard
When Skuna Bay Salmon contacted me about interviewing the chefs that will be representing them at Taste of Derby, I figured it would be a great opportunity to showcase a unique Derby Week event. I didn't realize it would be such a great lesson about realizing your dreams through hard work and dedication. It's been amazing to hear such accomplished chefs share both their passion for cooking and their advice for success. I so adore the message that today's chef has for professional women looking to break the glass ceiling: "It's not about your gender or race or anything like that...it is about your work ethic."
Yesterday, we talked with Denver-based chef Jennifer Jasinski. Today's interview is with Stephanie Izard, Executive Chef and co-owner of Chicago's Girl & The Goat and Little Goat restaurants. Stephanie, a Connecticut native, is a James Beard Award nominee, Food & Wine's "Top New Chef" and the winner of Season Four (and the first female winner!) of Bravo's Top Chef. Stephanie was kind enough to answer a few questions for us.
Yesterday, we talked with Denver-based chef Jennifer Jasinski. Today's interview is with Stephanie Izard, Executive Chef and co-owner of Chicago's Girl & The Goat and Little Goat restaurants. Stephanie, a Connecticut native, is a James Beard Award nominee, Food & Wine's "Top New Chef" and the winner of Season Four (and the first female winner!) of Bravo's Top Chef. Stephanie was kind enough to answer a few questions for us.
Stephanie Izard: I always loved to cook but did not really see being a chef as a career until I was in college at the University of Michigan. I was a sociology major and never really found anything I loved. My dad was the one that recommended I try culinary school. So I migrated south to the Scottsdale Culinary Institute for some warmer weather and to give cooking a shot. I loved everything about kitchens and restaurants. It was when I was working at La Tache for Dale Levitski that I really decided to open my own restaurant. I ran a special that sold out the same night and when another cook told me I should just open my own restaurant, I thought, Why not? So I quit and began the process of opening Scylla.
HK: What flavors/ types of cuisine are your main inspiration?
SI: I really love trying different countries cuisine and trying to incorporate global flavors into my dishes. Traveling through Asia really influenced my cooking and some Asian ingredients top my list. Since it is hard to leave the restaurant to go and travel the world, I do a lot of exploration through cookbooks.
SI: I really love trying different countries cuisine and trying to incorporate global flavors into my dishes. Traveling through Asia really influenced my cooking and some Asian ingredients top my list. Since it is hard to leave the restaurant to go and travel the world, I do a lot of exploration through cookbooks.
HK: What advice do you have for women who want to become chefs?
SI: I think it is very important to just put your head down and work. A lot of people talk about kitchens being a "boys-club" but there are also a lot of women. It's not about your gender or race or anything like that...it is about your work ethic.
SI: I think it is very important to just put your head down and work. A lot of people talk about kitchens being a "boys-club" but there are also a lot of women. It's not about your gender or race or anything like that...it is about your work ethic.
HK: Tell us a little about what you'll be cooking in Louisville this week.
SI: I know I'm making salmon, but honestly as I am trying to get packed up, my mind keeps racing and now I think goat will be added to the dish!
Stephanie graciously provided us with a recipe as well -- I'm fascinated by the flavor profile in this one!
½ cup lime juice
½ fresh Thai chili
½ bunch cilantro, thick bottom stems discarded
2 sprigs mint, picked
¼ cup canola oil
1 pound skinless salmon fillet, cut to a ¼in dice
2/3 cup hoisin sauce
3 spears white asparagus, thinly sliced on a bias
1 cup blueberries
½ cup slivered almonds, toasted
¼ cup micro sorrell
Place 16 miso spoons in the refrigerator.
SI: I know I'm making salmon, but honestly as I am trying to get packed up, my mind keeps racing and now I think goat will be added to the dish!
Stephanie graciously provided us with a recipe as well -- I'm fascinated by the flavor profile in this one!
Salmon Tartare with Piri Piri
Serves 16 as an appetizer½ cup lime juice
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| Skuna Bay Salmon |
½ bunch cilantro, thick bottom stems discarded
2 sprigs mint, picked
¼ cup canola oil
1 pound skinless salmon fillet, cut to a ¼in dice
2/3 cup hoisin sauce
3 spears white asparagus, thinly sliced on a bias
1 cup blueberries
½ cup slivered almonds, toasted
¼ cup micro sorrell
Place 16 miso spoons in the refrigerator.
Place
lime juice, Thai chili, cilantro, and mint in a mini food processor. Process on
high until the chili and herbs are pureed. With the processer running, add the
oil. Season with salt.
In
a glass bowl, toss the diced salmon with the hoisin sauce. In another glass
bowl, toss the asparagus, blueberries, and almonds with the piri piri dressing.
Place 1 oz of diced salmon on each miso spoon. Top with a teaspoon of asparagus
salad. Garnish with the micro sorrel, serve immediately.
Thanks so much to Stephanie, Jennifer, and Skuna Bay for taking time to talk to us. Here's hoping Taste of Derby is an amazing event!!
{No member of the HerKentucky writing staff was compensated in any way for this post.}
{No member of the HerKentucky writing staff was compensated in any way for this post.}