My Renewal Ceremony

On July 5, my husband and I will celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary. On July 13, we will renew our vows to commemorate the event. Two weeks ago I shared some of the details of our original ceremony so this week I thought I'd share some of the inspiration and ideas behind our renewal.

First things first, this is NOT a wedding. This is not Sarah's chance for a do-over. I've looked at my fair share of renewal ceremonies online and so often it just seems like the bride is playing dress up. Now, don't get me wrong. I LOVE playing dress up but this isn't a costume party. It's a celebration of my marriage, my family, and the life my husband and I have built together.

So... there will be no long white wedding dress, no big fancy wedding cake, no seated dinner, no walk down the aisle.

Now, I DID get a new dress. Let's not go overboard here. I wanted something tea length with a 1950's silhouette. I loved this dress and used it as my inspiration. I ended up with something pretty similar to my original dress in that it's mostly lace but it's short and ivory and VERY comfortable to dance in. I'm going to add a colored ribbon around the waist and similarly hued ballerina flat to cut down on the bridal aspect even more.

I also happen to be very good friends with the best and most creative florist in the tri-state region who I have given complete and total creative control so there WILL be flowers.

The bouquet is the inspiration for the floral theme - lots of bright summery blooms and overflowing arrangements. It's going to be stunning I have no doubt and a complete surprise to me which is even more fun!

We're having the ceremony in our front yard at sunset. Our plan is to walk out together with the boys and then exchange a few words underneath the giant maple in front of our home. My three dear friends from college who performed at our original wedding will be reprising their roles at this ceremony, which means the absolute world to me.

Afterwards, we're going to go around back and eat dessert and drink and dance the night away. Several years ago I attended the wedding my dear friend (and herKentucky contributor!) Amy Hille Glasscock. It was a gorgeous and thoughtful wedding from top to bottom but one of my favorite touches was she had friends and family bring pies to fill up the dessert table. I absolutely loved the idea of all that food made with love by people who knew the couple best so we'll be stealing Amy's idea. No cake just long tables full of pie!

Otherwise, my only plan is to have lots of twinkly lights, a loud speaker for my friend Mike so he can keep us rocking and dancing all night long, and lots of gangsta rap for when Mike takes a break.

No stress. No drama. No notebooks or Pinterest boards filled with high expectations and higher budgets. I did that the first time. This time it's about me and my amazing man and celebrating the relationship that has defined my life for the better part of a decade.

Oh... and there might be some Dip 'N Dots.

~ Sarah Stewart Holland

Happy National Bourbon Day!

Today is officially National Bourbon Day!  Sure, I'll celebrate!

My husband is becoming a bourbon aficionado, so more and more we are choosing our dinner destination based on its food AND bourbon menus.  Trust me, I am not complaining. Recently, while dining at Jonathan's at Gratz Park (Lexington), we sampled the Pappy Van Winkle (23 years old) and Parker's Heritage.  Both were superb and highly recommended. 



Pappy Van Winkle (20 years old), The Village Idiot, Lexington



 Two other bourbons we recently purchased and recommend are Angel's Envy (my personal favorite) and Jefferson's Presidential Select (18 years old):

Angel's Envy

Jefferson's Presidential Select (18 years old)

What's your favorite bourbon?

How a Wedding Photographer Plans Her Own Wedding

I am so happy to share today's guest post with y'all. I've known Amy Wallen for as long as I can remember -- our families have been friends and neighbors for generations. It's kind of amazing that the cute toddler who played in the yard with my little brother is now a beautiful bride-to-be with a unique and creative eye for photography and a business of her own! Amy agreed to share with us a few of the pro tips she's learned along the way and that she is working into her own upcoming ceremony. You can see more of Amy's awesome work on her website and her Facebook page. -- HCW

I just love the fact that my life is engulfed in weddings! What can I say? I love love, and I love photographing it! I still can't believe that I've created this business doing something that I'm so passionate about.

My fiance and I are coming up on our own wedding day, June 22.  Being on the other side of weddings, mixed up in all of the hype of planning, has truly given me a better sense of what a couple goes through when planning a wedding.

As a photographer, I never got to see behind the scenes during the planning process.  I would come to a wedding and instantly get excited. The venue is beautifully decorated, the bridesmaids are tending to the bride, the vendors are getting place.  It all seemed so fun to me! But now that I am so close to my own big day, I've realized just how much hard work, effort and MONEY goes into planning this monumental day. 

One thing that I like so much about shooting weddings, is the fact that each and every wedding is different from the last.  A ceremony on an airport runway, in a castle, at the church where her parents were married. Horseshoe favors, signature drinks, sparkler exits.  Everything about all of these little touches just gives me the warm fuzzies. I'm all about letting your personality shine through everything that you do. And when my clients show off a family heirloom, have a special father daughter dance, or incorporate a high school letterman jacket, I feel as if I'm right in the middle of their love story.

When I began planning my wedding day, I knew that I wanted it to be unique, and very true to Sam and me.  We are laid back, goofy, country and a little bit old school.  We love Sunday drives in his '83 Chevy truck, fishing at Jenny Wiley Lake, dancing in the kitchen, and laughing constantly. Our breezy outdoor field ceremony fits perfectly with our personality.  We both love being outside, and spending time with our friends and family. The woods were the perfect venue.

Amy and Sam

I love the idea of not being matchy. You can throw in SO many personal touches nowadays, there's no reason to try to blend in!  Mismatched bridesmaids dresses also pulled our big day together. Light peaches and pinks with breezy fabrics surely fit the bill.

Being a photographer really almost makes me overanalyze my decisions. “What if it rains like it did at x’s wedding? What if we run out of food? What if???” So many things run through my mind, just because I’ve seen so much of it before. At the end of the day, every single wedding I have shot has been beautiful, due in part to the bride and groom being head over heels in love. Isn’t that the most important part?

Sometimes I feel like we forget the reason for a wedding. It’s meant to share the love between two people amongst family and friends. I can’t wait to have my own wedding. Regardless of everything else, I’m marrying my soul mate.  That’s good enough for me.

{all images courtesy Amy Wallen.}

Our Night to Remember

They say that June is wedding month. I'm not sure I've ever been to a wedding in June, though! After yesterday's near 100 degree temperatures swept across the Commonwealth, I think I know why.

Almost four years ago, we scheduled an October wedding. My husband and I are fall and winter people. I love Central Kentucky in the fall - the sharp chilliness of the mornings that blossom into beautiful blue skied afternoons full of a backdrop of brilliant leaves.

Our outdoor wedding was billed as a backyard barbecue party that just so happened to have a wedding thrown in. My husband had already done the wedding thing once before, so he gave me a few of his "must-haves" for our wedding/party and left me to go crazy. Funny enough, I was never a girl who spent her adolescence planning her nuptials. I had no idea what I wanted, but I knew I wanted something that felt authentic to us - fun and casual with touches of sentimentality that reflected our individuality.

While my wedding may have taken place before Pinterest, it did not take place before Martha Stewart Weddings, Rock n Roll Bride, or Weddingbee. I may not have had pinboards galore, but I had Google docs full of links, pictures and lists of ideas! Since we wanted to keep our wedding small and personal, I decided to do quite a bit of DIY. I also had lots of help from my wonderful family and friends. These are just a few of the personal touches that I feel made our wedding special for us.

The bridesmaids found dresses off the rack within the color scheme (green and brown) and rocked their favorite boots while groomsmen wore button-down shirts and their most comfortable jeans (as did the groom). I made my own wedding dress - wonky hem and all, I loved it.

 

photo by Clay Jackson 

I made our bouquets - sheaves of wheat with brown ribbon - from supplies in the bargain bins at the craft store.

photo by Clay Jackson

The wedding took place in the backyard of my parents' home. We decorated with handmade votive lanterns along the fencerow - my family and friends saved all their salsa, peanut butter and spaghetti jars for months!

photo by Clay Jackson

 

Luckily, we had a tent with walls that kept out the chilliest October day in recent memory (boo!). Also luckily, my parents had a supply of firewood for a late-in-the-reception bonfire. Of course, that bonfire was the site of quite a few rounds of bourbon passed around the circle - something of a family tradition. I, eventually, donned a pair of blue jeans underneath my dress because I got so chilly.

photo by Clay Jackson

Inside, the tent was filled with lanterns, votives and table decorations that were simply squares of fabric topped with centerpieces that featured photos from our travels and favorite quotes.

 

photo by Clay Jackson 

With the help of the internet, our officiant (who also happened to be my cousin) and my own flair for the dramatic, I wrote the marriage ceremony and our vows. In true Jason-and-Lydia inappropriateness, we first sealed our marriage pronouncement with a high-five (we got to the more traditional kiss later).

photo by Clay Jackson; I also made the banner in the background here

Food was handmade by my awesome aunts, uncles and friends of the family. We had some authentic, kick-ass, best-in-the-whole-world Western Kentucky barbecue (St. Augustine Catholic Church recipe) made by my uncles paired with potato salad, pasta salad and appetizers made by my aunts and served buffet-style. No one needs fancy flatware with that menu, so I made easy-to-carry and cute flatware packets.

photo by Clay Jackson

My handy dad crafted a dance floor for the reception. On the backs of our RSVP cards, I asked our guests to write three songs that they'd request from a wedding DJ. I used those, plus our own favorites and family traditional wedding songs (we do an awesome number to Shout! but aren't big on The Chicken Dance) to construct a 3+ hour dance-til-you-drop playlist.

photo by Clay Jackson

Our wedding was a labor of love for me. I relished choosing and crafting all the little details. During one of our dances together, my not-always-enthusiastic-about-the-details husband whispered, "This is perfect. I'll never doubt any of your crazy ideas, again! Thank you."

In the end, of course, it was one day - one awesome day - but only one day of so many that make up a marriage. For us, it was the perfect way to publicly commemorate our commitment to one another and to share the love with our families and friends.

If you're planning a wedding, you don't have to DIY everything or have the biggest and best of everything for your day to be special. Look for ways to make sure that you and your relationship shine through. Make it meaningful, make it real and you won't go wrong.

Our Friend Liz

Y'all remember our fabulous friend Liz, right?

She went went to school. In Italy. To study shoes. I mean, how amazing is that?

That's M. Louboutin. With our friend Liz.

Um, it gets better. She's met Christian Louboutin. And she's married to a dreamy doctor. The best part? She's completely sweet and cool.

So cool, in fact, that back in December she offered to custom-design one of her signature handbags for one lucky HerKentucky reader. She and the winner, Brandi, exchanged emails, worked together on the design, and came up with this darling design. 

Western KY-based attorney, HerKentucky reader, and aspiring purse model Brandi.

Brandi is a convert to Elizabeth Elfen Designs. She says: 

"Liz was so wonderful to work with. I have NO EXPERIENCE in design and was excited I won such a neat giveaway but was apprehensive about what I possibly could contribute. Liz took the lead and sent me samples and gave me options and ideas. She was very supportive and her fabrics were so beautiful. When I received the bag I was blown away. I was really impressed with her skill and care at the creation of my bag! It represents my style (classic with a touch of flare). It will definitely become a staple in closet. Thank you for such a wonderful experience Liz, I truly will remember it fondly….and I have the bag to prove it!"

Liz has lots up her sleeve these days. She and Dr Hotpants are leaving Brooklyn to embark on a Midwestern adventure (not. even. kidding. They had a Green Acres-themed cocktail party.) She has started a fabulous new blog, The Fanciest Chicken, where she talks food, fashion, and fabulousity. I am seriously so amazed by this, y'all. She found vintage Chanel earrings. On eBay. And shares her shopping secrets on her blog. 

Oh, and one more big announcement: Liz is joining the HerKentucky team as a style corespondent! How fabulous is that?

Please join us in welcoming Liz to HerKentucky, and go check out The Fanciest Chicken today! 

Seven Things Your Wedding Minister Thinks (but Doesn't Say)

June, as we all know, is the traditional "wedding month." Our sweet friend Erin, whom you may recall as the Kentucky gal who preaches in the desert, and who learned it all from her days as a sorority rush chair, was kind enough to share a few words of advice for all our readers who may be walking down the aisle this month. As always, Erin's essay had me laughing and crying and just being so proud to claim her as my sorority sister and my friend. Y'all can find more of Erin's beautiful writing on her blog, Irreverin.-- HCW

Some Stuff the Minister is Thinking as you Plan your “Perfect Wedding”

Erin loved getting to marry her brother Chris...

1. We roll inward eyes a little when you say you want 1 Corinthians 13 read in the ceremony. Yes, love is patient, love is kind. We get it. But we have to actually SAY things in the service other than ‘do you take this man/woman, etc,’ and well…that little gem of scripture has done been said. It’s been said a lot. Give us something to work with, other than the magic of your love.

2. We die a little inside when we say, ‘the church will provide a wedding coordinator for the rehearsal,’ and you say, ‘oh, no, my mother’s going to do it!’ Trust us. That will not end well for anybody.

3. You are not going to shock us with your family drama. No matter how many crazy siblings, inappropriate uncles, or unconventional marriages you bring into the church, we have seen it all. Oh, and also? 9 out of 10 of us could care less if you are living together. And even if we did, we know you are lying when you talk about ‘my apartment.’

...and her other brother Chris!

4. No, you cannot take down the purple Advent décor in the sanctuary and replace it with red and green stuff that ‘matches the dresses.’ Baby Jesus doesn’t care ‘what it looks like in the pictures.’ You want a church wedding? This is a church.

 

5. If your cousin ‘who’s a preacher’ insists on reading something from Genesis, we get to approve which translation he’s packing.

6. We triple dog dare you to question our fee. If you do, we will ask you how much you are paying the caterer, the band, the wedding planner, the hairdresser, the bartender; and then we will gently remind you that while our services are the cheapest of any of these, we went to more school, and spent way more time planning for your perfect day.  Grace is free, but our time isn’t. Also—eye rolling and inward groaning aside—from this day forward, til death do you part, we are invested in your marriage. We want it to succeed, and that’s why we’re blessing it. I don’t think the bass player feels the same way about the sanctity of this whole business.

7. And finally, as you plan that perfect day, remember that:

“Perfect” is a dangerous word. For life in general, and for marriage in particular. Chances are, if you have unrealistic expectations of this day, you likely have some unrealistic expectations about marriage, as well.  Expect that there will be a big family meltdown, a major hair malfunction, and/or something in the neighborhood of a bird flying into the sanctuary and dropping an unwanted gift on your grandma’s corsage. Likewise, accept that you will gain a few pounds over the next 50 years, and so will your spouse; you will fight, you will lose money, you will face disappointment—possibly in each other. Life will get messy, and even the most perfect-est, magazine-worthy, color-coordinated and professionally choreographed wedding in the world will not keep that from happening.

So put down that Southern Living wedding edition, step the ^!%* AWAY from Pinterest, and get ready to actually BE married. For better, or for worse. If you go into your special, perfect day in full awareness of all the ways that the wheels can come off, then you will actually have FUN at your own wedding. You will see every little hitch and hiccup as a welcome and introduction to the full, joyful, and unpredictable life you are about to enter, with the person who is your soul’s delight.  Their shoes will not always match you hair accessories… in fact, unless you are getting married in high school (please, don’t) and you still have prom to look forward to (just, please, no) then your attire will probably never match again. And yet… a life shared in love—in all its sacred messiness—is so much better than even the most ‘perfect’ day you can imagine.

Because ultimately—even if we can’t read it without rolling our eyes a little—love gives you life. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things.

Love endures all things. Even the perfect blush and bashful wedding.

Love never ends. 

Mark Twain and Lincoln

I have the privilege to work in our beautiful State Capitol building in Frankfort and walk by this statue of Abraham Lincoln each day.  Whenever I find myself in the presence of this great Kentuckian who takes center stage in the Capitol Rotunda, I cannot help but agree with Mark Twain.  Yes, indeed, Lincoln "belonged just where he was put."