Bid Day, RushTok, and Why I Volunteer With My Sorority

 
 

It feels like sorority recruitment has been everywhere I look lately.

Part of that is because I’m at a “particular” point in life where a lot of my friends are now sending their daughters to college, and rush is frequently a component of the conversation. Part of it is because I’ve recently gotten involved with volunteering with my own collegiate sorority chapter. And, of course, part of it is because of the ubiquitous phenomenon of RushTok.

This time of year, those TikTok videos of recruitment chants and potential new member outfits of the day are as fascinating to Southern women as SEC football podcasts are to our male counterparts. It’s part nostalgia for our own collegiate days, part instruction manual for our own daughters who may soon be participating and part an outshoot of our national obsession with reality TV. It’s no wonder that many friends have asked me recently “are you watching RushTok this year?”

 

Balloon installation at Phi Mu National Convention, 2022

 

Now, if you’ve been following this blog for a while, you know that I had a really great sorority experience and that I am a huge proponent of sororities and women’s clubs. I absolutely loved recruitment and I was frequently put in the role of “floater,” which meant that I talked to a lot of potential new members and often was requested to “save” failing conversations. I was given this role for the same reason that I’ve been entrusted with the guest book at a lot of weddings — apparently, I’ve been told, I can make conversation with anyone. “Watson can strike up a conversation with a telephone pole” was the analogy I often heard during my own sorority days. This is, I hear, a compliment.  Because I loved recruitment during my own college years and because I’ve volunteered as an alumna to assist during collegiate rush, of course I’m interested in seeing how it’s being portrayed on social media. While the back flips, dance moves, glitzy outfits, drama and general mania of RushTok makes for insanely entertaining scrolling, it’s pretty far from both my experience as a sorority woman at a tiny liberal arts college in the 1990s and from what I see in the daily reality of twenty-first century sorority life.

 

My own bid day, nearly 30 years ago. Decidedly NOT TikTok material.

 

Over the years, I’ve volunteered with my sorority’s collegiate chapters as frequently as my personal and professional life would allow. I love the experience of helping college-age women develop their leadership skills and better understand intra-organizational communication and group membership. On the rare occasion when I am asked “why are you still messing with sorority stuff in your forties?” I point to the ways that, through the shared values of a sorority bond, I have watched collegiate women develop their voices as leaders and soon-to-be professionals.

 

Phi Mu Convention, 2022

 

Earlier this summer, I attended Phi Mu National Convention in the role of alumna advisor to my collegiate chapter. We attended leadership trainings, listened to keynote speakers and learned from one another. It was a fascinating glimpse at how college women across the country view their leadership roles. It was also a wonderful lesson in the way that so many collegiate sorority members are standing up for a more equitable recruitment and more diverse chapters. They are taking an active role in shaping an organization that fits the needs of modern college-aged women. I was absolutely awestruck by the level of poise and professionalism with which so many of these women articulated their vision for the immediate future of the organization — it was a far cry from the vision of sorority life that has been propagated ad nauseum by a certain segment of the media in response to RushTok. I also had the opportunity to see several women whom I’d advised over the years and who’ve now gone on to volunteer as well. It was a fantastic moment — I guess it’s what they call “coming full-circle” — that made me feel that the mentorship and advice I’d provided to collegiate members over the years had been important and useful. I also talked to women who’d been members of our sisterhood for over 50 years and still serve as active volunteers. It was a powerful reminder of the lasting impact of shared philanthropic, social, and moral goals.

 

With my friend and sorority sister, Heather, at National Convention.

 

Today, twenty-nine years after my own Bid Day, I’ve gotten the news that my college roommate’s daughter pledged our sorority earlier this week and that another sorority sister’s daughter pledged our chapter this morning. It was a lovely feeling to know that these young women are embracing the same values and purpose that we did during our college careers. It’s not the stuff of juicy RushTok documentaries, but it’s a really special feeling.

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